Insights Into Teens

Insights Into Teens: Episode 183 "Teens and Anger Management"

November 27, 2023 Madison and Joseph Whalen Season 5 Episode 183
Insights Into Teens: Episode 183 "Teens and Anger Management"
Insights Into Teens
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Insights Into Teens
Insights Into Teens: Episode 183 "Teens and Anger Management"
Nov 27, 2023 Season 5 Episode 183
Madison and Joseph Whalen

Are you struggling to comprehend your teenager's sudden bursts of anger? Do you feel like you're walking on eggshells, not knowing when the next emotional explosion might occur? We understand that parenting a teenager is like navigating through a stormy sea, and we’re here to help. I'm Joseph Whalen, and along with my daughter Madison, we delve into the intricate world of teen anger management. We offer a fresh perspective on the importance of healthy anger expression and the debilitating signs of unmanaged anger. 

As we paddle deeper into the vast ocean of adolescent emotional health, you will gain valuable insights from our personal experiences. We discuss the multiple factors contributing to teen anger, from hormones to mental health disorders, and the significance of professional intervention. Looking through the lens of our own experiences, we provide proactive strategies and supportive systems to help your teen navigate through their emotional storms. Particularly, we spotlight the unique challenges faced by teenage boys, for whom societal norms often create barriers in expressing their emotions.

Finally, we invite you to join our growing community where we continually share our experiences and insights. Stay connected with us via email, social media, our official website, and more. With two more exciting episodes lined up, be sure not to miss out on our journey to understand, manage, and transform teen anger into a positive force. So, if you're ready to transform your understanding of teen anger and create a more peaceful home environment, join us on this enlightening journey.

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Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Are you struggling to comprehend your teenager's sudden bursts of anger? Do you feel like you're walking on eggshells, not knowing when the next emotional explosion might occur? We understand that parenting a teenager is like navigating through a stormy sea, and we’re here to help. I'm Joseph Whalen, and along with my daughter Madison, we delve into the intricate world of teen anger management. We offer a fresh perspective on the importance of healthy anger expression and the debilitating signs of unmanaged anger. 

As we paddle deeper into the vast ocean of adolescent emotional health, you will gain valuable insights from our personal experiences. We discuss the multiple factors contributing to teen anger, from hormones to mental health disorders, and the significance of professional intervention. Looking through the lens of our own experiences, we provide proactive strategies and supportive systems to help your teen navigate through their emotional storms. Particularly, we spotlight the unique challenges faced by teenage boys, for whom societal norms often create barriers in expressing their emotions.

Finally, we invite you to join our growing community where we continually share our experiences and insights. Stay connected with us via email, social media, our official website, and more. With two more exciting episodes lined up, be sure not to miss out on our journey to understand, manage, and transform teen anger into a positive force. So, if you're ready to transform your understanding of teen anger and create a more peaceful home environment, join us on this enlightening journey.

No Credits Rolled, where we play the games you love but rarely finish them!

Buzzsprout - Let's get your podcast launched!
Start for FREE

An original podcast by a husband and wife team of self professed pop-culture geeks. It is a discussion about all things entertainment from movies and music to television and pop culture. We examine some of the more obscure aspects of the entertainment industry.

Create Harmony

This is a podcast about setting an intentional rhythm, savoring life’s blessings and...

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

Buzzsprout - Let's get your podcast launched!
Start for FREE

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Speaker 1:

Insightful Podcasts by Informative Hosts. Insights into Things a podcast network. Welcome to Insights into Teens, a podcast series exploring the issues and challenges of today's youth. Your hosts are Joseph and Madison Whalen, a father and daughter team making their way through the challenges of the teenage years.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to Insights into I have to Clear my Throat Teens, Episode 183 Teens and Anger Management. I'm your host, Joseph Fragata's throat Whalen, and my expressive and informed co-host, Madison Whalen.

Speaker 3:

Hello everyone.

Speaker 2:

How are you doing today, Maddie?

Speaker 3:

I'm doing alright. How about you?

Speaker 2:

Oh, I'm doing fantastic. If I was doing any better they'd have to arrest me.

Speaker 3:

Why though?

Speaker 2:

That's just a joke, I guess. Fair enough, anyway. So anything exciting happen this week.

Speaker 3:

I got my hair cut.

Speaker 2:

You did Just one of them.

Speaker 3:

No.

Speaker 2:

You got them all, cut I got my hair cut then. There you go, my hair's cut Y'all.

Speaker 3:

Really.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, why not Bad jokes, sweetie? That's really all I got.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that's fair.

Speaker 2:

Anything else, exciting happen.

Speaker 3:

It's almost Thanksgiving, I guess, so that's pretty cool.

Speaker 2:

I guess that's exciting. I was kind of referring to your report card.

Speaker 3:

Oh yeah, my report card.

Speaker 2:

That's going to cost me a boatload of money because you got so many A's in it this time, but congratulations to you on that.

Speaker 3:

Thanks.

Speaker 2:

So today we are talking teens and anger management. In a 2022 survey of 1,000 parents of teens, two-thirds identified anger as a concerning indicator that would prompt them to seek treatment for their teenager. Adolescents frequently experience anger due to the significant changes they undergo physically, mentally and socially, compounded by the substantial decisions they face. Although teen anger is a common emotion, its origins can vary. It might stem from appropriate emotional expression or even be linked to a mental disorder. Explosive and violent outbursts, as well as common anger episodes, can sometimes be indicative of an anger problem necessitating anger management treatment.

Speaker 2:

In today's episode of Insights in the Teens, we'll talk about how parents can help kids with anger management, but before we do that, I want to take a moment to invite our listening audience to subscribe to the podcast. You can find audio versions of this podcast listed as Insights in the Teens, or you can find audio and video versions of all the Networks podcast listed as Insights into Things Pretty much any place you can find a podcast these days. I would also encourage you to write in and give us your feedback, tell us how we're doing. You can email us at comments at insights into thingscom. You can find us on Twitter or X at insights, underscore things, or you can find links to all that and more on our official website at wwwinsightsintothingscom. Shall we get into it?

Speaker 3:

We shall.

Speaker 2:

Let's commence shalling. So once again we're tapping into that wonderful well of knowledge at Newportacademycom for this week's notes. So they ask what is healthy anger in teens? The concept of healthy anger in teens is a seemingly paradoxical idea. Anger, a completely normal emotion, can actually be beneficial if expressed and managed constructively. This is particularly relevant for teenagers, who often face challenges and situations that evoke strong emotional responses. Let's consider a common scenario. A teen faces an unfair situation like an undeserved punishment from a teacher. The situation naturally triggers anger. Such emotional responses are not only valid, but also natural. However, the way teens express this anger is crucial. It's important that their expression, whether through raised voices or tears, doesn't lead to harm. Communication plays a vital role here, so open conversations about the situation, where the teen's perspective is acknowledged, can validate their feelings and promote understanding. A study by the American Psychological Association found that teens who feel heard and understood by their parents are more than likely to manage their emotions effectively.

Speaker 3:

Parents are instrumental in guiding teens through these emotional landscapes. These are tools for processing anger constructively. For instance, physical activities like running or creative outlets can be excellent ways for teens to release the energy associated with anger. A 2021 research article in the Journal of Adolescent Health emphasized the benefits of physical exercise in regulating emotions in teenagers. Encouraging healthy coping mechanisms is essential.

Speaker 2:

It not only Just read it the way it's written.

Speaker 3:

This not only aids in managing anger, but also equips teens with life skills for handling emotions. A survey conducted by the National Institute of Mental Health revealed that teens who practice healthy coping strategies are better navigating emotional challenges. Understanding and managing anger in a healthy way is a vital skill for teens. It's a collaborative effort where open communication, acknowledging feelings and constructive outlets play key roles. This approach not only helps in the current situation, but also prepares teens for emotional challenges in the future.

Speaker 2:

When should you worry about an angry teenager? While anger is a normal emotion, how it's expressed and its intensity can sometimes signal deeper issues. Unhealthy anger in teens often appears when their anger is at a proportion to the situation or when it leads to uncontrollable or violent outbursts. If a teen frequently gets angry over minor things, this is a red flag. Physiologically, the body isn't meant to sustain high levels of anger. Frequently, Research has linked such persistent, intense anger to mental health issues like teenage depression. Sometimes a teenager's anger is actually a sign of deeper emotional struggles. They might be able I'm sorry they might be dealing with feelings they're not comfortable sharing, leading to irritability and frequent outbursts. Engaging in open conversations can help uncover these underlying issues. A study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health highlights the importance of understanding the emotional context behind a teenager's anger.

Speaker 3:

Hormonal changes during adolescence also play a role in fluctuations, including anger. While these hormone-induced mood changes are often temporary, it's still crucial to monitor their impact on the teen's well-being. Distinguishing between normal mood variations and unhealthy patterns of anger is key. Identifying signs of unhealthy anger involves looking at the frequency, intensity and appropriateness of a teen's emotional responses. Managing this requires open communication offering tools for anger management and recognizing potential underlying emotional challenges. By addressing unhealthy anger, we can support our teen's emotional health and overall well-being.

Speaker 2:

So I think the bottom line is everybody gets angry. Why you're getting angry and how you deal with that anger is really the important thing. So in your own life have you experienced situations where you felt your anger was justified, yet had difficulty expressing it constructively?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, probably. I certainly had situations where I think my anger was justified and, like at this point, I do kind of have instances like that. Now it was way worse when I was in sixth grade. I always seemed to bring that up sometimes when sixth grade was kind of the year where everything kind of hit me like a truck or something.

Speaker 3:

But I am realizing now that there are things that I kind of get mad about and I think justifiably like people being annoying in class. I understand that like it's not that big of a deal, but specifically there's this one period where they consistently are annoying and deliberately make themselves annoying, probably just for the attention, because my entire class is pretty much just full of class clowns and like I don't do anything about it. I kind of just, like you know, stay stuff under my breath. I could probably be doing something a little better by just not really paying attention to it or actually trying to be like hey, I want to actually put a stop to this in a more constructive manner. I don't entirely do that right now. I kind of just, like you know, say stuff under my breath and try not to listen to them.

Speaker 2:

So kind of a passive, aggressive way of dealing with it.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Well, considering the role communication plays in managing emotions, how do you feel adults like parents or teachers could improve their approach in understanding and addressing the anger teenagers often experience?

Speaker 3:

Well, I guess this is sort of just a general thing when it comes to most adults and their views on teenage emotional expression. I wouldn't just chalk it up to like, oh the teenager, they're just being a teenager, it's. You know, whatever you can. Teenagers are rebellious or like mainly just following stereotypes of teenagers.

Speaker 2:

The infamous teen angst angle.

Speaker 3:

Pretty much. Yeah, it's like you know the whole. It's not a phase mom or whatever. And I feel like if adults like listen to that less, like there would actually be good communication between them and their teen. Because more than likely that if, like, your teen's not telling you anything and you are just following those stereotypes, they're probably not telling you anything because they don't think you'd respect them enough to actually communicate with them in a productive manner.

Speaker 2:

That's a very good point. Respect is something that's key to communication, especially when you're talking about things of this nature, where it's a highly emotionally charged thing and the parents aren't giving the kids the respect they need to sit down and talk to them. They obviously recognize there's a problem and they just want to explain it in a way as teen angst. Or you're going through a phase, or it's not a big deal or you'll get over it. It's a mistake that I've made in the past and one that you know I'm learning slowly, but I'm learning to certainly take it a little bit I don't want to say too seriously but certainly understand your perspective when it comes to situations like that.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So what are some methods that you've found effective in managing strong emotions, and how do you think these strategies impact your overall well-being?

Speaker 3:

Well, a lot of it, I do feel, is kind of talking about it, like this podcast was actually, you know, originally created as a way to help me get through some of the more complicated emotions, and whenever I can with either you or mommy, I would normally talk about stuff that would make me angry, and sure, you know, looking back at a lot of it it could kind of seem more meaningless, but the idea of at least talking about it and getting my frustrations out in a way that, like I'm not directly shouting at anybody but I'm just explaining my frustration about a specific thing I feel like has been very helpful. Another thing I found is the idea of kind of taking your mind off things by watching videos, playing video games or doing something in a more like relaxed manner. That kind of can take you off the edge.

Speaker 2:

Okay, that makes a lot of sense. I mean, I think all of us need some kind of release like that, or, if not a release, at least a distraction, to kind of de-stress and come back energized to deal with these things.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and that sort of thing also helps me from ever lashing out at anybody, because, you know, a lot of the times I like to consider it sort of like a steaming kettle or something, where it's like, if I don't let out like some steam, sometimes it's like I'm going to burst, and when I burst I'm not going to be able to control myself. So, and if I keep it all inside, that's really not going to help and it's just going to get worse and worse until I exploded in uncontrolled manner.

Speaker 2:

Right, so you let it out in controlled burst. This way, you can control it, you can manipulate it and you can even use it for constructive purposes in situations like that too. Yeah, so as of right now, do you think that you're a very angry person at this point?

Speaker 3:

Not really. I certainly used to be to the point where I had almost no emotional control and would lash out at my friends and even one time I lashed out at a teacher and I really did not have a huge emotional control. I also thought very negatively and very rarely ever thought positively. Right now I feel I'm not really an angry type of person. I can certainly be miserable at times but like I'm not particularly angry. I can certainly get angry because, like there are certain things that can just annoy me, but I don't really lash out anymore like I used to and I don't always get angry at like the littlest things anymore. So I certainly would say that I've gotten better with my anger.

Speaker 2:

Okay and that's good. I can freely admit that when I was your age, a little bit younger, I had serious anger management issues and it stemmed from a lot of different sources. There was some significant stress points at home because of my father. There was school stress that everyone winds up going through. It's different for everybody, but everybody winds up going through it. You know, I struggled in a couple of classes. There were certain pressures socially that I was on there that caused it. So for me my anger issues were multifaceted and it took a while for me to finally get a grip on them and figure out how to deal with these things and deal with them one problem at a time, as much as you can. So I think we're going to take a quick break and when we come back you're going to tell us what causes teen anger, at least some of the causes of it. We'll be right back.

Speaker 2:

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Speaker 3:

Welcome back to Insights and Teens. Today we're talking about teens and anger management, and now we're going to talk about what causes teen anger. Understanding the factors behind teen anger is essential to address the question of why adolescents may be experiencing heightened anger. It's important to differentiate between normal, healthy and potentially problematic, unhealthy anger. The causes of teen anger can be diverse and complex, and investigating these underlying reasons is crucial for effective intervention.

Speaker 2:

There are various factors that can contribute to teen anger, each requiring careful consideration. While occasional bouts of anger are normal during this developmental stage, persistent and pervasive anger may signify more significant issues that warrant attention. Some potential causes of chronic teen anger include underlying mental health conditions. Anger can be a symptom of an underlying mental health condition, such as depression, anxiety or oppositional defiant disorder, which we talked about in a previous podcast. In some cases, anger may serve as a defense mechanism for deeper emotional struggles. Substance abuse is another cause. Substance abuse can exacerbate and distort emotional responses, leading to heightened anger and irritability. Discussing and addressing substance abuse issues is crucial for managing anger.

Speaker 3:

Unprocessed trauma is another one Past. Traumas can fuel unresolved anger as the emotions associated with the trauma remain unprocessed. Therapy is often necessary to help teens work through and heal from traumatic experiences. Learned behaviors is also a factor. Teens may learn unhealthy ways of expressing anger from family dynamics or their environment. Family dysfunction, modeling of aggressive behavior or history of conflict at home can contribute to maladaptive anger expression. The final factor they list here is unprocessed emotions. Teens might struggle with processing a wide range of emotions, and angers can sometimes become a default emotional response. This can stem from an inability to understand or communicate their feelings effectively.

Speaker 2:

Addressing some of these underlying issues requires professional help and intervention. A mental health or substance abuse diagnosis necessitates specialized medical and therapeutic treatment. Teens who have learned negative behavior patterns might benefit from anger management classes or therapeutic interventions that address underlying family dynamics. Furthermore, individuals who rely on anger as a way to express their emotions can benefit from therapy aimed at enhancing emotional regulation skills and fostering healthier coping mechanisms.

Speaker 3:

Recognizing the sources of teen anger and distinguishing between normal and emotional expression and potentially harmful patterns is essential for providing appropriate support. Identifying and addressing underlying factors through professional help can pave the way for healthier emotional development and effective anger management strategies.

Speaker 2:

So do you find that you run into anger issues, whether they're minor, severe, healthy, unhealthy? Do you get angry? Are you the type of person who just doesn't get angry?

Speaker 3:

I can certainly get angry. I'm not going to say that, oh, I never get angry. I know that one of my friends might have mentioned something where it's like I never see you getting angry, I just see you getting disappointed. No, I can get angry. It can either be because the cats are being bad. People are just being really loud. In school, when I'm trying to focus on an assignment, there's just technical issues I'm facing, or I'm working on writing or drawing something and I keep making the same mistake over and over again, or I don't think it looks perfect and even though I'm drawing and trying to continually fix it, I always seem to ruin it.

Speaker 2:

So it's almost like you get angry at yourself more than you get angry at other people. It sounds.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, kind of.

Speaker 2:

Are there any particular strategies or support systems that you find helpful in managing intense emotions like this?

Speaker 3:

Well, usually stepping away from those sort of things and trying to focus on something else or doing something else that's a little more common can usually help. I might just watch a YouTube video or just go pet a cat, or if I can't do that, just try to focus on something else and try to just step away from it and kind of take time to kind of calm myself down pretty much.

Speaker 2:

That's a good idea. I mean, divorcing yourself from whatever is making you angry is always a good way of helping to cope with that, in your opinion, how much do you think your environment and the behaviors you observe around you influence your own expression of anger? And caveat here, I'm probably the number one expression of anger in this house. Here, however, I will say that my anger, when I get angry, is almost always directed at inanimate objects. I go through painstaking meditative processes to limit it to objects, mostly technology around the house, rather than individuals around the house.

Speaker 3:

I'm pretty sure I've mentioned this before, but I feel like your anger towards inanimate objects is what kind of led me on the path of like. If there's some sort of technological problem or there's some like object that normally always works but for some reason isn't working right now, I will get angry at it.

Speaker 2:

Well, and it's worth mentioning that most of the angst that I have that generates anger is from technology, and I work in technology. That's my chosen profession, and the technology around the house that usually causes the most anger are things that have to do with the podcast.

Speaker 2:

You know, for instance, knock on wood, we're doing pretty good today, without any technical glitches until I say that, of course, but we could turn everything off, finish the recording, walk away, come back tomorrow, turn it back on, and nothing will work, and for no good reason, and, being of an analytical mind and a troubleshooting person that I am, that drives me insane, and that's what causes most of my anger. Does that influence you, though? Is that me to seeing me For lack of a better term act like an idiot, like that? Does that influence you and make you angry, or do you feed off of that?

Speaker 3:

I don't think I ever really feed off your anger. It's kind of more of a mimicking thing that happens without like anything relating. It's probably like you'll be angry at something and then I'll be angry at something else, but it'll be a very similar thing Whenever you do do it. It's more I'm afraid than I am angry.

Speaker 2:

Well, and why would you be afraid? It's not like I've ever hurt anyone in that anger.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, but I don't really like people shouting. There was one specific time recently where we were planning on doing a podcast. We had been planning on doing for a while, and I just said planning twice. My apologies.

Speaker 2:

Sorry, we'll give you an extra commission on that.

Speaker 3:

Thanks, and mommy's headphones weren't working because we were doing episode 180. And when you told me to find the plug for it, I accidentally hit the switch on the adapter and everything turned off and you would already like troubleshoot it multiple times trying to get this to work. And then you pretty much just lost it and I was just terrified.

Speaker 2:

Well, and you know what? It's funny because in that instance I took your attack. I had to walk away. I was so frustrated by that point in time that it could have been anything that would have set me off that one more problem that I ran into that day and we weren't doing a podcast. It just so happened to be that you turn the power off, which maybe that was for the best, because maybe if we had sat and tried to go through it and something else came up, it would have made it worse. But that was my coping mechanism. I just I had to walk away because my blood pressure was up, I was agitated and I was too annoyed to continue down things. So maybe you saved me more problems than I think that it caused.

Speaker 2:

Maybe, but you know we all get angry and you know when it happens to me here and I yell and I scream and I curse and I make a big deal, I'll walk away. And usually my rule of thumb is you get three shots, I'll walk away. That's one shot. I'll come back, I'll try it again, but get frustrated, I'll walk away and I'll come back one more time after I've calmed down. And after that, if I can't get things to work the way they're supposed to work, then I'm done, I quit, I walk away and I come back another day. And you know, we came back a couple of days later and we did a podcast and everything was fine. Yeah, I mean, no one still didn't work. By the way, I still have to figure out what the problem is.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

But anyway. So yeah, we all get angry, Turn it into something good.

Speaker 3:

Yep.

Speaker 2:

We're going to take another quick break and when we come back we're going to talk about specifically why boys, why anger is in more, why is anger in boys more common? I could have said that probably 12 other ways too, but yeah, or at least is that a perception. Is it a perception that it's just in boys, Because growing up it always was. You know, it's whatever and thought for me, but we'll talk about that when we get back in 60 ticks.

Speaker 1:

Insights into entertainment, a podcast series taking a deeper look into entertainment and media. Our husband and wife team of pop culture fanatics are exploring all things, from music and movies to television and fandom. We'll look at the interesting and obscure entertainment news of the week. We'll talk about theme park and pop culture news. We'll give you the latest and greatest on pop culture conventions. We'll give you a deep dive into Disney, star Wars and much more. Check out our video episodes at youtubecom backslash insights into things, our audio episodes at podcastinsightsintoentertainmentcom, or check us out on the web at insightsintothingscom.

Speaker 3:

Welcome back to insights into teens. Today we're talking about teens and anger management, and now we're going to talk about why is anger in boys more common, or you know if it's just a myth or something, or whatever, something like you said before A myth, or a myth or?

Speaker 3:

legend. The prevalence of anger in adolescent boys raises questions about its underlying causes and implications for mental health. Understanding why anger appears more common in boys can shed light on the unique challenges they face and the importance of early intervention Mental health conditions. Boys are more prone to express underlying mental health conditions such as depression, anxiety and bipolar disorder through anger and irritability. This can make it harder to recognize their emotional struggles, and these symptoms might be misconstrued as simply bad behavior.

Speaker 2:

Research from the Journal of Family Medicine and Primary Care suggests that boys often externalize their emotional distress through anger, aggression and even violence, rather than displaying the more stereotypical signs of sadness or hopelessness associated with depression. The difference in emotional expression can make it challenging to identify when boys are struggling with their mental health. Societal norms and expectations can play a role in shaping how boys express emotions. Boys may feel societal pressure to exhibit toughness and suppress vulnerability, which can lead to masking their emotional pain with anger. Boys might encounter barriers in seeking help for their emotional struggles. Societal stigma around mental health issues and a cultural bias against seeking help can discourage boys from reaching out for help.

Speaker 3:

Understanding that disruptive or aggressive behaviors in boys might stem from deeper emotional challenges is paramount. Parents and caregivers should be vigilant about these signs, understanding that outward anger could be an indicator of a significant underlying mental health disorder. Providing a safe and open space for boys to discuss their emotions, seeking professional help when needed and addressing societal norms that discourage emotional expression can contribute to healthier emotional development. Early intervention and support can help boys navigate the complexities of their emotions and mental well-being, ultimately leading to healthier outcomes.

Speaker 2:

So is it a perception that boys have more anger issues, or do you experience that boys tend to have more anger issues?

Speaker 3:

I do feel like there's certainly this idea that men kind of experience more anger than women and I do feel it's more or less the idea that they can't really express any other emotion, because I've seen a lot of people online kind of talking about how men aren't really supposed to be vulnerable and there's the societal stigma of they have to be tough and emotions are weak or whatever.

Speaker 2:

So you would agree with the statement that it's societal and cultural factors that play a role in how males typically handle their emotions.

Speaker 3:

And also the idea that they're not really able to talk about mental issues that they experience and, obviously, the stigma around mental health for them.

Speaker 2:

Now again, I agree, and I think that's certainly been the case, but I can say since I was your age, things have gotten significantly better. There are there's a lot those, a lot of those barriers are coming down, fortunately, and there's a lot more um support outlets out there for for men, and there are a lot of times it's not the traditional, uh, you know, mental health type things that you would, you would look at. A lot of times it's through clubs and it's through um very masculine sort of activities so that men can ease into that sort of thing, which is, I think, is a good thing. Yeah, what barriers do you think exist for boys in seeking help, and how do you think these could be overcome?

Speaker 3:

Um, well, the barriers that, uh, they might experience could possibly be pure pressure that they have from their classmates, their parents, their teachers or just really anybody in their life, basically saying like, oh, you know, your problems don't really matter all that much or, oh, you're not supposed to be feeling that sort of thing.

Speaker 3:

Um, and I do know that there are people out there that kind of say things that are basically like oh man, you can't be this way because you have to be strong and you're supposed to be doing that and if you're not, then you're not really a man. And I feel like that stuff can really get to younger boys and when it comes to, you know, actually shaping them as an individual, it I feel like that can, that like really can negatively affect them. And if we were, and if they're going to be able to overcome those barriers, we kind of have to change the social stigma around their mental health and basically say it's okay to feel any sort of emotion, you're allowed to do that Like it doesn't make you weak, you're okay, so it can actually. It actually you might even be seen as being stronger if you're able to be more vulnerable to people that you trust.

Speaker 2:

I agree, and we've thrown the term toxic masculinity around in the past and you hear it in society a lot and it usually refers to something very different. But I think this is another form of toxic masculinity, where the expectations that are placed on males to act tough and to not be vulnerable and, to you know, not succumb to your emotions. I think that's another form of toxic masculinity because it forces you into unhealthy situations.

Speaker 3:

I mean, yeah, and I've seen like a lot of different, like older men kind of saying that men can't, that the only thing that they can feel is anger and that there's nothing else. They're not allowed to feel sad, they're not allowed, and like they'll shame other men if they ever feel sad or even cry.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and you know what it's. The really the sad thing is that there's enough anger in the world that we don't need to foster any more of it. Yeah, so a lot of parents want to know how can I help my teenager manage their anger? Well, assisting adolescents in managing their anger requires a balanced approach that combines effective communication, emotional regulation techniques and a clear boundaries. Here's how parents can help their angry teens navigate their emotions and develop healthy anger management strategies. The first is obvious Offer help. Let your teen know that you're there to support them in their journey to manage anger. Provide reassurance that is okay to feel angry, but that it's important to express and manage those emotions in a healthy manner.

Speaker 3:

You should also prioritize battles. Recognize that not every issue needs to be confronted. Letting go of minor complaints can prevent unnecessary conflicts and provide a calmer atmosphere for addressing more significant concerns. There's also positive framing when addressing issues. Start with the first issue. Addressing issues. Start with praise or positive aspects of their behavior before addressing criticisms. This approach can reduce the feeling of being judged and create a more receptive atmosphere for conversation. You should also model self-control. Parents should demonstrate emotional regulation themselves. Taking a time out when feeling angry and addressing issues calmly can serve as a valuable example for teens to follow. You should also respect personal space. If a teen wants to step away to calm down, allow them the time and space to do so. Pushing for immediate interaction might escalate the situation further.

Speaker 2:

You should also encourage open dialogue. Create an environment where teens feel comfortable discussing their emotions openly. Encourage them to express what triggers their anger and explore ways to address those triggers constructively. Teach problem solving. Guide teens through problem solving techniques. Help them identify alternatives to angry outbursts, empowering them to find more constructive ways of addressing challenges. Also, set clear boundaries. Establish boundaries for behavior, ensuring that both parties understand the consequences of crossing these limits. Consistency in enforcing these boundaries Can help teens understand the expectations. There's also relaxation techniques.

Speaker 3:

Incorporate relaxation techniques at home to help teens manage anger in the moment. Techniques like muscle tensing and releasing or visualization of a safe and calming place can provide immediate relief during heated moments. And finally we say this a lot you should seek professional help. If anger issues persist or become detrimental, consider seeking professional help. Anger management programs, therapy and counseling can offer teens the necessary tools to navigate their emotions and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

Speaker 2:

By combining these strategies, parents can play a significant role in helping their teens develop the skills to manage anger, communicate effectively and navigate challenging emotions in a productive way. So, after talking about all of that and they're all many things that we've talked about numerous times, dealing with other emotions other than anger Considering all the strategies that we've mentioned for managing anger, like offering support and teaching problem solving, which ones resonate most with you? Do you think?

Speaker 3:

They offer support ones resonates with me because you know, I feel like that's one that is very helpful. It pretty much shows that you know you're willing to help your teen. You don't just think it's some sort of phrase or them being rebellious, and it shows that you actually care about your teen enough to, you know, want to admit that, yes, this is a bit of a problem, but don't worry, I'm here for you.

Speaker 2:

Now you play a supporting role emotionally with a lot of your children? Do you play a supporting role emotionally with a lot of your friends for a lot of other scenarios that we've talked about on the podcast in the past? Do you find that any of your friends have anger issues that you have helped them cope with or guide them through based on your own experiences?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I do remember that some of my friends who were around the age that I started to have a struggle with struggles with trying to control my emotions Around the time that they were that age, they also had similar issues to mine and pretty much whenever they would get angry at each other or would just be angry in general they would probably. They would talk to me and I'd always tell them, hey, best thing to do, you know, get away from whatever's making you angry, try, you know some coping strategies. And if they ever did, you know, need to rant to me about, like, whatever problem they were having. I was always like, okay, let me hear the situation, tell me what's going on, I'll see what I can do to help. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And a lot of times, like you said before, just being able to talk it through, having someone that can just listen to the problems that you're running into, can be a great way to de-stress and relieve some of that anger that you might have. So, whether it's an adult, whether it's a counselor or a parent or just another friend, having someone there that can listen, that won't judge you but will give you your space and hear you out, anything is a huge help that can benefit teens. Yeah, so I think that's all we had. We're going to take a quick break. We'll come back, we'll get your closing thoughts and finish up the business of the podcast.

Speaker 3:

All right. So to everybody out there, I just want to say that anger is a very natural, very normal emotion. It's something I feel everybody pretty much experiences, obviously on different levels. I feel anger can be very productive when it's able to be used in such a way, but it can also be very destructive. Finding good ways of coping with anger I feel is very important, and to parents out there who are experiencing or who have teens that have issues with dealing with anger, I feel like offering support is the best thing to do. Don't judge them for it. Don't resort to teen stereotypes, thinking it's just a phase they're going through or they're just being rebellious. A lot of the time that's going to invalidate their feelings and it's more than likely going to make them not really trust you as much. So really best to do is just offer support and help guide them through it.

Speaker 2:

Sage advice, as always.

Speaker 3:

Thank you.

Speaker 2:

Another fantastic topic. Before we do go, I want to once again implore our listening and viewing audience to subscribe to the podcast. You can find audio versions of this podcast listed as insights into teens. You can find video and audio versions of all the networks podcast listed as insights into things, and we're on Google, spotify, iheartradio, anywhere. You can get a podcast Also. Be sure to reach out to us, tell us how we're doing, give us your suggestions for topics. You can email us at comments and insights into thingscom. You can find us on x at insights underscore things. We do have a high res versions of all of our videos on YouTube at youtubecom slash insights into things. We still stream five days a week on twitch at twitchtv slash insights into things, and you can find links to all that and more on our official website at wwwinsightsintethingscom, and you.

Speaker 3:

And don't forget to check out our other two podcasts insights in the entertainment now being hosted by you and Sam, and insights into tomorrow. Not really sure how many times we're going to be doing it, but it's hosted by you and my mother.

Speaker 2:

For the record, we've got two episodes scripted out and ready to go. We'll probably be filming one later this week after the holiday. That's it, folks. Another one of the books. Bye everyone, thank you.

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